I can tell as you turn...I smell the sulfur so clear...
And fire's a beautiful sound...and the wings that you burn... Turn to ashes my dear...and ashes just fall to the ground... ...Yeah, we're only ashes.
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InSaNeLoVe29
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Name: marlane
Country: United States
State: Nebraska
Metro: Fremont
Birthday: 12/29/1988
Message: message meEmail: email me
Website: visit my website
AIM: 
gUiTariNsaNiTy29
Member Since:
3/19/2004
Subscriptions
Saturday, September 23, 2006...ive become anorexic.
....i dont really know how it happened....but its amazing.
..i dont get hungry, and if i think i am, i look at food and it makes me sick...no matter what it is....i dont know...its weird...so i didnt eat for a few days and i got kinda tired and shit.
...then josh forced me to eat....i dont know its just weird...i think its from this new med im taking...but whatever..
...i kinda like it.
Sunday, September 03, 2006....i cut today..
...my roomates hid all the razorblades from me.
...im back to this.
Tuesday, August 29, 2006...i am fucking PISSED off.
...don't ever, EVER, ever, EVER shop at gordmans. fuck them.
...so ive been working there for like 2.5 weeks...always on time, always doing what im told, always quick...working fucking TEN hour days with ONE fucking break....but hey its money right?
....well last night i was puking like all night...and then again this morning...so i called in and told them what was going on and that i couldnt come in...and my manager was like..."you know what, no, we are just going to terminate your employment."....i was like wtf?...for being sick i get fired...and i even said i could come in i would be fine...but she was like no...we are terminating your employment. i was like fuck you.
....i am not in a good mood. and i have no weed....NONE and no one will come sell me some cuz i live so fucking FAR AWAY.
...and i want to cut...like cut deep.
this shit fucking SUCKS.
Tuesday, August 22, 2006...sometimes i know im just a freaking moron.
...i dont understand how i would rather go back to someone who i know cheats on me and basically treats me like dirt....rather than be alone....but i hate it....it gets so lonely....i live with my best friend and her husband so im constantly around people who are in love...which kinda sucks sometimes...and i know you dont need a man to make you happy blah blah..
....but its so hard doing this alone.
Monday, August 14, 2006....i don't know...
.....just when things get better, they seem to get worse. i found all my camcorder tapes today and made the stupid mistake of watching them.
....its so fucking gay because i have all these people that i was SO close with and spent SO much time with....but right now, i have no fucking clue what they are doing or where they are....and it kinda sucks.....and now everyone is going off to college...
...i've been thinking about cutting so much lately. like i just stare at my razors and imagine the feeling....
...i got all this new medicine, but i cant tell if its working or not...mainly because ive been drinking like every night....
....blah. i just want all this pain to be over.
...soon.
| InSaNeLoVe29 |
|---|
|
read my profile sign my guestbook Name: marlane Country: United States State: Nebraska Metro: Fremont Birthday: 12/29/1988 Message: message meEmail: email me Website: visit my website AIM: gUiTariNsaNiTy29
Member Since: 3/19/2004 |
| Subscriptions |
|---|
...ive become anorexic. ....i dont really know how it happened....but its amazing. ..i dont get hungry, and if i think i am, i look at food and it makes me sick...no matter what it is....i dont know...its weird...so i didnt eat for a few days and i got kinda tired and shit. ...then josh forced me to eat....i dont know its just weird...i think its from this new med im taking...but whatever.. ...i kinda like it.
| |
....i cut today.. ...my roomates hid all the razorblades from me. ...im back to this. | |
...i am fucking PISSED off.
...don't ever, EVER, ever, EVER shop at gordmans. fuck them. ...so ive been working there for like 2.5 weeks...always on time, always doing what im told, always quick...working fucking TEN hour days with ONE fucking break....but hey its money right? ....well last night i was puking like all night...and then again this morning...so i called in and told them what was going on and that i couldnt come in...and my manager was like..."you know what, no, we are just going to terminate your employment."....i was like wtf?...for being sick i get fired...and i even said i could come in i would be fine...but she was like no...we are terminating your employment. i was like fuck you. ....i am not in a good mood. and i have no weed....NONE and no one will come sell me some cuz i live so fucking FAR AWAY. ...and i want to cut...like cut deep. this shit fucking SUCKS. | |
...sometimes i know im just a freaking moron. ...i dont understand how i would rather go back to someone who i know cheats on me and basically treats me like dirt....rather than be alone....but i hate it....it gets so lonely....i live with my best friend and her husband so im constantly around people who are in love...which kinda sucks sometimes...and i know you dont need a man to make you happy blah blah.. ....but its so hard doing this alone.
| |
....i don't know...
.....just when things get better, they seem to get worse. i found all my camcorder tapes today and made the stupid mistake of watching them. ....its so fucking gay because i have all these people that i was SO close with and spent SO much time with....but right now, i have no fucking clue what they are doing or where they are....and it kinda sucks.....and now everyone is going off to college... ...i've been thinking about cutting so much lately. like i just stare at my razors and imagine the feeling.... ...i got all this new medicine, but i cant tell if its working or not...mainly because ive been drinking like every night.... ....blah. i just want all this pain to be over. ...soon.
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